SPEAK NO. . . . . SEE NO . . . . . HEAR NO. . . . . .

One of the major reasons we have emotional issues is because we are sentient beings; and the senses of  Speech, Sight and Hearing have the most to do with that.

Speech: Is one of the primary ways we think we communicate. I say THINK we communicate because it also happens to be the way we mostly miscommunicate! When we speak we hear our words and assume that what we hear is what the other person(s) hears; this is not always the case. As far as our emotions are concerned, someone not hearing what we say can be a source of our emotional issue(s).

Sight: There are over 30 areas of the brain connected with vision, all of which have various connections throughout the brain. So, for most of us, how we see things impacts directly on our vision/view of the world. Yet, ironically, there are no pictures in the brain. So, what we see is ultimately a representation of our perception.

Hearing: This is the opposite side of the equation of speech; but is intrinsically linked to our own personal experience of life!  When we speak we hear what we say and know what we mean (or at least think we do); we tend to assume that it is also what the other person hears and understands; this is not always the case. We each have an internal representation of all the words that we know and are quite adept at adjusting our auditory sense to fit in with the vast array of different combinations of sounds/tones that we encounter.

Every time we see something (or think we did), say something (or think we did) or hear something (or think we did) we have to make sense of what we saw, said or heard. Yet without doubt each of us will have had the experience of seeing something that wasn't there, or wasn't what, or who, we thought it was. Said something, yet others told us we said something different; or didn't say it al all! Or heard something that wasn't there or what we thought it was!

So, what does this have to do with emotional issues? Well, the truth is that our senses are not always reliable; but nevertheless we rely upon them. When we are growing up as children we will all experience something, or in fact everything, for the first time. When that happens we give it meaning. Sometimes, it is the meaning we are told by our parents, or some other well meaning adult. Most of us may remember asking our parents, "where did I come from" and being told that a stork brought you (or some other excuse)! Quite an understandable excuse. As surely telling a small child about the human reproductive process would be too difficult to comprehend; especially since it is likely that their logical brain has not yet fully developed!

But what about telling a child that: boys don't cry, you mustn't get angry, think before you leap, he who hesitates is lost, if you don't go to sleep the bogey man will get you, smoking is bad for you (as you light up your own cigarette), or you must eat all of your dinner (but you don't do it yourself), or they see signs saying $500 Fine for throwing Litter (and watch you throw litter), why aren't you like your brother/sister etc. etc. From the day we are born we are bombarded with ambiguity or things that confuse or confound us!

Like it or not, our mind likes, or even demands, clarity! If you are incapable of providing clarity, it will seek it in its own way; and that may or may not be to our liking! I believe that people who smoke, drink, take drugs, are over or underweight and say they don't want to do that, mostly have a higher level of ambiguity, or lack of clarity about their life. Your unconscious mind has a natural predeliction to survive; with or without your permission. And subconsciously doing things you do not want to do consciously is the only thing that  makes perfect sense?

As children we may experience trauma and cope with it very well. Sometimes it is the judgment we place on this trauma as an adult or adolescent that causes the problem. If a child is abused they often don't rationalise it as abuse; perhaps just something unpleasant. However, as an adult the full context of what happened becomes apparent; and to which they then ascribe a new meaning. This new meaning allows them to redefine the experience, or give it a different context. This can affect their thinking processes and create an emotional (chemical) response that becomes, almost, unique to that experience; but it can also spill over into every similar experience.

Life can be very complex and how we experience it depends, to a large extent, on our ability to have a greater understanding of what happened to us. There are often several ways that we can (re)frame an experience into our life and sometimes seeing things in a different context, or from another perspective, can have a vast influence on the outcome we achieve.

Some people have overcome the biggest trauma(s)  and gone on to live a very happy and fruitful life. Others have experienced a lesser trauma and yet it has dominated their life; they have not got over it!

Whatever your experience of life, therapy can often help to change life back to something of value, a worthwhile experience!

Emotional issues can have a huge impact on the quality of our life and can be implicated in many of the illnesses diseases and disorders that we suffer from! It is believed that up to 75% of all illness is psychosomatic in nature; psychological in origin physical in nature! A high price to pay for a lack of clarity or certainty?

If you have concerns about how an emotional issue is affecting your life; or that of a loved one. Why not call for an informal chat to discuss your options?

To book your free Consultation CLICK HERE

+65 9186 3575 or email: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

Trans4mational Therapy Calming Life's Ripples